Dead Letters and Cursed Gems
Seven museums on the National Mall, each hiding something absurd. A flag stitched on a brewery floor by a widow and a thirteen-year-old. A cursed diamond mailed for two dollars and forty-four cents. A Leonardo da Vinci smuggled in a suitcase under an FBI codename. A college student who got a C and amended the Constitution. And the most important airplane in history, exiled to London over a grudge.
What You'll Experience
Plan your walk
Know the route before you buy
- Starts at
- Introduction
- Ends at
- The Reveal
- Walking plan
- 2h 30m · ~1.5 miles
- Schedule
- Start, pause, and resume anytime
Included in the app
- Professional narration
- GPS-triggered stops
- Downloadable tour audio
- Ask the Historian Q&A
- Optional end-of-tour reveal
- All 9 story stops
A taste of what you'll hear
9 stops, each with its own story. Here's a preview.
"You're on the National Mall. Two miles of free museums, all in a row — America's attic, open to the public, no charge. Here's what the exhibit labels don't tell you."
"The Smithsonian Castle. Look at it — red sandstone, turrets, towers. It looks like it was lifted straight out of twelfth-century England. Which is the point. The architect deliberately echoed the English collegiate Gothic tradition."
"Alright. Seven stops. Seven fakes. Let's sort them out. Grace Wisher stitching her initials into the ninth stripe of the flag. Fake. Grace was real — she sewed that flag on the brewery floor. The Smithsonian erased her for nearly two hundred years."
Tour itinerary
Every stop on this walk
Explore the route before you go. Each stop has its own story preview, location details, and place in the larger tour.
- 11IntroductionYou're on the National Mall. Two miles of free museums, all in a row — America's attic, open to the public, no charge.38.8912, -77.0300 Read this stop
- 22National Museum of American HistoryThe National Museum of American History. It's not the prettiest thing on the Mall — pink marble, designed by committee.38.8912, -77.0300 Read this stop
- 33National Museum of African American History and CultureThe National Museum of African American History and Culture. That building with the bronze lattice — three tiers stepping outward, sitting...38.8911, -77.0328 Read this stop
- 44National Museum of Natural HistoryThe National Museum of Natural History. That huge building with the columns. A hundred and forty-eight million specimens inside, and almost...38.8913, -77.0266 Read this stop
- 55Smithsonian CastleThe Smithsonian Castle. Look at it — red sandstone, turrets, towers. It looks like it was lifted straight out of twelfth-century England.38.8888, -77.0260 Read this stop
- 66National ArchivesThe National Archives. Those columns — seventy-two of them, each fifty-three feet high, weighing ninety-five tons apiece.38.8937, -77.0231 Read this stop
- 77National Gallery of ArtThe National Gallery of Art. Seven hundred and eighty feet of Tennessee pink marble — when it opened, the largest marble structure in the...38.8913, -77.0199 Read this stop
- 88National Air and Space MuseumThe National Air and Space Museum. You're looking at the building that, at its peak, was the most visited museum in the world — nine million...38.8882, -77.0199 Read this stop
- 99The RevealAlright. Seven stops. Seven fakes. Let's sort them out. Grace Wisher stitching her initials into the ninth stripe of the flag. Fake.38.8882, -77.0199 Read this stop
Stories first
Every stop is built around people, conflict, ambition, and consequences—not a plaque read aloud.
Most of it is true. The extra mischief is just a wink at the end, but the story is what carries the walk.
Have questions? Just ask.
Curious about something you heard? Want to know more about a place? Ask us anything — we have a lot to say. It's more fun when it's a conversation.
Ready?
Download the app, head to the starting point, and press play. The stories start themselves.
Get the AppBefore you go
Quick answers
How much is this tour?
$9.99 as a one-time purchase in the iOS app. The Washington DC city pack is $14.99 and includes every currently available tour in the city.
Can I use it with spotty cell service?
Download the tour audio on Wi-Fi before leaving. Cached narration plays without streaming; map tiles and other online features may still need a connection.
Do I have to start at a specific time?
No. Start when it suits you, pause for a detour or meal, and resume later. Check the opening hours of any venue you personally plan to enter.
Are admission tickets included?
The purchase covers the Bad Historian audio experience. Transportation, food, and admission to third-party attractions are not included.
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Dead Letters and Cursed Gems
$9.99 · one-time