The South Bank
The rowdy south shore London kept its theatres, brothels, and prisons on — now a power station full of art, a wheel that was 'temporary' for twenty-four years, a warship the government tried to scrap, and the tallest tower in Western Europe. Shakespeare's Globe, Tate Modern, Borough Market, HMS Belfast, and a few details the Bad Historian invented.
What You'll Experience
Plan your walk
Know the route before you buy
- Starts at
- Introduction
- Ends at
- The Reveal
- Walking plan
- 1h · ~2.1 miles
- Schedule
- Start, pause, and resume anytime
Included in the app
- Professional narration
- GPS-triggered stops
- Downloadable tour audio
- Ask the Historian Q&A
- Optional end-of-tour reveal
- All 12 story stops
A taste of what you'll hear
12 stops, each with its own story. Here's a preview.
"You are on the wrong side of the river. For most of London's history, that was the entire point. Bankside was where the City of London sent everything it wanted but wouldn't admit to wanting — the theatres, the brothels, the bear pits, the prisons."
"That pub on the riverfront is the Anchor, and there has been a tavern standing on this exact spot for more than eight hundred years — which makes it, by most reckonings, the oldest surviving drinking spot on this whole stretch of the Thames."
"You walked from a wheel London called temporary for twenty-four years to the tallest building in Western Europe. Everything in between used to be the part of the city polite London pretended didn't exist."
Tour itinerary
Every stop on this walk
Explore the route before you go. Each stop has its own story preview, location details, and place in the larger tour.
- 11IntroductionYou are on the wrong side of the river. For most of London's history, that was the entire point.51.5033, -0.1195 Read this stop
- 22The London EyeThat's the London Eye — the enormous, slow, glass-capsuled wheel turning over the river in front of you.51.5033, -0.1195 Read this stop
- 33Southbank Centre & the National TheatreThis whole stretch of concrete terraces and river-facing halls is the Southbank Centre, and none of it was supposed to still be here.51.5063, -0.1147 Read this stop
- 44The OXO TowerLook up at that square tower with the windows arranged in three vertical rows on every side. Those windows are not decoration. Read them.51.5074, -0.1088 Read this stop
- 55Tate ModernThis enormous brick building with the single tall chimney is Tate Modern, and until the year two thousand it was doing a completely...51.5076, -0.0994 Read this stop
- 66Shakespeare's GlobeThis round, timber-framed, thatched-roof building is Shakespeare's Globe, and it exists here, on this exact stretch of riverbank, because...51.5081, -0.0972 Read this stop
- 77The Anchor, BanksideThat pub on the riverfront is the Anchor, and there has been a tavern standing on this exact spot for more than eight hundred years — which...51.5069, -0.0938 Read this stop
- 88The Clink & the Golden HindeThat narrow building is the Clink Prison Museum. It stands on the site of one of the oldest and most notorious prisons in England — old...51.5062, -0.0908 Read this stop
- 99Borough Market & Southwark CathedralBorough Market — the covered food market around you, all stalls and shouted prices and the smell of a dozen different cuisines at once.51.5055, -0.0910 Read this stop
- 1010The ShardThe Shard — the tallest building in Western Europe, tapering up into a glass point above you — wasn't even supposed to be called that.51.5045, -0.0865 Read this stop
- 1111HMS BelfastThat grey warship moored in the river is HMS Belfast, and more than three hundred thousand people a year climb its nine decks to see what a...51.5063, -0.0754 Read this stop
- 1212The RevealYou walked from a wheel London called temporary for twenty-four years to the tallest building in Western Europe.51.5063, -0.0754 Read this stop
Stories first
Every stop is built around people, conflict, ambition, and consequences—not a plaque read aloud.
Most of it is true. The extra mischief is just a wink at the end, but the story is what carries the walk.
Have questions? Just ask.
Curious about something you heard? Want to know more about a place? Ask us anything — we have a lot to say. It's more fun when it's a conversation.
Ready?
Download the app, head to the starting point, and press play. The stories start themselves.
Get the AppBefore you go
Quick answers
How much is this tour?
$9.99 as a one-time purchase in the iOS app. The London city pack is $14.99 and includes every currently available tour in the city.
Can I use it with spotty cell service?
Download the tour audio on Wi-Fi before leaving. Cached narration plays without streaming; map tiles and other online features may still need a connection.
Do I have to start at a specific time?
No. Start when it suits you, pause for a detour or meal, and resume later. Check the opening hours of any venue you personally plan to enter.
Are admission tickets included?
The purchase covers the Bad Historian audio experience. Transportation, food, and admission to third-party attractions are not included.
Other London Tours
Greenwich
Greenwich
The place where the whole planet agreed what time it is. A racing ship named after a witch's nightie, nearly destroyed by a vacuum cleaner. A palace Wren sliced in half so a queen could keep her view. A self-taught carpenter who beat Britain's top scientists — who cheated to stop him. And an anarchist who tried to bomb time itself and only blew up his own hand. Time, longitude and the Prime Meridian — with a few details the Bad Historian invented.
Embankment
How London Was Built
Every toilet in London still flushes through Victorian sewers built by a man who doubled the pipe size on a hunch — whose great-great-grandson gave Britain Big Brother. The Tube map is a beautiful, deliberate lie copied all over the world. You can ride a train through an 1843 tunnel dug by copying a shipworm. And the old London Bridge is baking in the Arizona desert. The hidden engineering that holds the city up — plus a few details the Bad Historian invented.
St Paul's
St Paul's & the Great Fire of London
In 1666 this whole city burned to the ground in four days — and they hanged a man for it who wasn't even in the country when it started. A golden grasshopper has survived being burned down twice. A goose dodged the slaughterhouse for 38 years and got a funeral. And a cathedral rebuilt by an astronomer refused to fall during the Blitz while everything around it burned. How London burned and rose again — plus a few details the Bad Historian invented.
Shoreditch
The East End & Whitechapel
One building here was a French church, then a synagogue, then a mosque — the same walls handed down through wave after wave of refugees. Big Ben and the American Liberty Bell were cast in the same tiny Whitechapel yard. The 'Elephant Man' built a paper cathedral with one hand. And the most feared gangster in London shot a man dead in a pub, steps from where the Salvation Army was born. The real East End — refugees, rebels, and the Kray twins — with a few details the Bad Historian invented.
Westminster
Westminster & Big Ben
Big Ben is a cracked bell they never fixed. There's a spot near Parliament where a toilet was secretly a phone to the President of the United States. Real hippos are buried under Trafalgar Square. And a teenager once broke into Buckingham Palace to steal the royal underwear. Seven of the most photographed places in Britain, and the parts the guidebooks leave out — with a few small details the Bad Historian invented, revealed at the end.
The South Bank
$9.99 · one-time